Some dibshit recently replied:

“Hey bro

you’er a bit dumb.

you write to long..

The point of copywriting is to BE CLEAR…

caption attentoin…

and keep it.

But peoples have attenion span of gold fish…

so you shouldn’t write long lines.

no one reads it long.

Keep it shhort like me.

and don’t use jargon like leads and psycology

people don’t know.

do this or i unsub”

I don’t know if this kid knows this, but I’m actually NOT writing to an audience of mentally ill third graders.

Clearly he didn’t get the memo.

Or I’m sorry… that’s “jargon,” let me phrase it for him:

You’re actually so much of a dumbass that I’ve had to put up this new sign on my website:

Here’s my personal response to the 3rd grader that said this (you know who you are):

I am dumb.

So dumb, in fact, that I wrote those “long-lined” emails filled with tons of horribly confusing “jargon.”

and that’s exactly why my emails do HORRIBLY…

That’s why they only got me a better CTR than 80% of all newsletters on beehiiv.

That’s why I’ve only made hundreds this month with emails, barely writing one a day… and last month… etc. etc.

It’s so disappointing.

I’m so disappointed….

And you know what? To save you the pain of reading another one of my… super confusing and long-winded emails… I’ve kicked you the fuck out of my list (by the head).

Bottom line is:

There is NOTHING wrong with writing emails that have full sentences, basic words everyone knows, and more than a “shrimp’s length” worth of lines.

well.. unless you’re writing to a bunch of third graders.

or a complicated market.

In that case you’d want to check out this:

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